Rape- Lets talk about it, guys.
And I Mean On a completely raw and Intimate level.
Although many of you reading this will cringe at the words, the truth of the matter is this- Rape Culture Is something that is far too Mainstream of a happening. The Facts state that not only are 1 in 5 women Experiencing some sort of sexual assault, But 1 in 5 men are right there With them.
Statistically Speaking Less than 60% of all Rapes are Reported to law enforcement, With A Depressing 41% Prosecution rate.
History shows us that To mention sexual assault usually resulted in Shamìng the person who is placing the accusations . There are only 2% Of reported rapes coming to be false . This tells us that Our Judicial Effort to Punish these offenders is not very high. Sure, having them register as a sexual offender is a good start, but its not enough . Really, How many of us take the time to look into our local sex offender list? (Which I Highly suggest you doing) With our Judicial System Looking at these Sex Crimes as less than heinous , We are stuck With Serial Rapists Running around as they please. This is not Only Frightening, but it puts us and our loved ones at risk. With this sad truth, The next step for us is to educate ourselves and Stand in our power if It came to defending ourselves or anyone else , for that matter!
Lets get one thing Clear...
Rape is Never About sex, Its about power. In the Mind of a sexual predator, its about Finding Someone you see as Vunerable and deciding in that moment,, youre going to take the ultimate power from them-- Their OWN Personal Power . And often times,, The Life of the victim is in the hands of this Offender .
The Shaming that is instantly bestowed upon someone who is being demeaned in this manner, is Ridiculous . No One should feel that. No one should have to go through An act that Leaves bits of their soul scattered Across Universes .
So what about the Impact that an event like this has on a person's body?
The Human Body is Truly an Extraordinary Being and functions far beyond what we can at times, understand. Your body has a Language all its own, and its in constant communication with every aspect of itself.
Without knowing it, our body can Place itself into A State of depression when It experiences A Traumatic event .
Symptoms like fatigue and Anxiety are very common , The aproach for all of this, should be gentleness and Respect for how you feel, when this occurs. You must understand that not only does your mindset needs to heal, but your emotions and your Body.
There are medical anomalies for a reason, simply telling us that there are things beyond our comprehension ( for a reason.)
For the first Year and a half after my trauma happened, the only person who could give me an Orgasm, was myself . My body didnt trust that of another . It took my awareness of the matter to get the ball rolling for Healing to start.
Often times, Our body will sense something wrong , before our brain processes it. This is where we need to listen to what our body says, if it demands rest, give it. Same with emotions, give them the utmost respect. Come to accept and take note of your triggers, these are your keys to allowing yourself be. There is Absolutely NOTHING is wrong with you, and this was not your fault
If you are someone who has gone through an event of sexual assault, I am so sorry, My Sweet.
If you are here reading this, then that means you've Survived, and the only place im going to help you go, is up. It doesn't matter Where you're at in life-physically, the MOST Important thing for you right now is Your healing journey.
The events of sexual assault could have happened one month ago, one year ago, or even a decade ago- the timeline does not matter, this is something that will always be imprinted on someones life . When you go through the cycles of regathering yourself and your sanity (because trust me, you could be the most emotionally stable person, but after an event like that nothing can protect you from the shifty mindsets)
Healing is Inevitable, and you will go through periods of highs and lows . Just remember, You CAN trust, and especially, You should try to trust your Friends. Isolation is not what you should be doing, but do try your best not to over-do it with the social aspect. My suggestion , would be to take it day by day. You needn't Rush anything, and be proud of your progress as it happens every moment. YOU hold the power of your life, and if youre ever in a situation like that again (Ipray to God you never are) I Pray You will get the choice of defending your life in any way possible. If you have to see the person who did this , know that they have no power over you. Some people need judicial justice, some need to forgive, while others need to Get a bat and take matter into their own hands . All Approaches to coping are A step towards Personal Wholeness (Unless, you are Diminishing yourself as a human with drugs, constant self harm or anything along those lines- If this is the case, I suggest you seek professional help immedietely. You are worth your life)
If you dont feel like talking about it sometimes, thats fine. If you feel the need to talk about it, be brave and understand that talking about it might Trigger you, but this is something that will occur throughout your life , and the more comfortable you get with opening up, the easier it will get with sharing.
Its Going to be okay, I Promise .
What can We do to help?
On a Judicial level, theres not much we can do but be persistent in the punishing Of these offenders . Never Allow Stigma or fear to keep you from speaking up !
We Can stand our ground when someone shuts down the subject of sexual assault , Especially if we need to speak from personal experience (Often times talking out loud about it with someone , helps you Release weight from your shoulders)
On the Contrary, If someone wants to talk about sexual assault, Do be a Good listener and Open your heart to them. Often times, It takes Such Bravery to open up about an Incident like this, so if it happens do your best to be a friend. It May be a taboo subject to talk about, it is however, NOT taboo of a happening.
Remember, my sweets, you are not alone. Even if you dont know someone personal you feel you can talk to, there are support groups with women and men who have experienced this same thing , and they understand where you're at...
And, theres always me . I am here for you, Even if its 3am and youre having a horrible flashback episode,, Never hesitate to reach out, my heart in those moments , is for you.
Rape is not cool, and its not even A good subject to talk about . But it must be talked about
All of my love and support ,
E.B
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